I have decided to add occasional posts focused on scriptures, my thoughts etc…. there likely will be a bit of a theme of things I am personally working on, and striving for…so bare with me if that gets old.:) I am just trying to learn how to become more comfortable in communicating this side of myself, since it is an area I have often been kind of quiet/private in.

Proverbs 17:22

“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.”

On the surface my first thoughts basically are along the lines of the simple truth of how attitude, and what is going on within us affects everything–our thoughts, how we view things, the choices that we make,and how we see our own selves. Sometimes it can seem so tempting to curl-up into the dark, our worries, our negative self-talk…it kind of has a way of crooning to us, and then trapping us down, and pulling us away from what we love, believe, our ultimate goals, and who we truly are. It can weaken our hold on our faith, make it hard to trust, and limit our ability to keep our hearts open to the spirit, and guidance that we need. If we block-out our friends and family, of course it is likely that we also can build-up unintentional walls at a much deeper level as well. We just can become so clouded that we cannot see it. We might even be desperate for help.. light… even think that we are seeking… but can be unaware that we have built our own obstacles that prevent us from seeing and hearing. I know I have, many times.

On the flip-side, when we are able to keep a positive perspective, and seek for the good in situations and people… things have a way of working-out, no matter how daunting they may first appear. When our hearts are open, the weight of problems are much lighter, and we are far more receptive to the aid that we need in tackling things. In a way, cheerfulness…a “merry heart”…as light and simple as it may sound, can be one of the most important tools to help us face the storms that come at us, because it also enables us to hold firmer to our faith, and have clearer vision and understanding of the purpose of things. People have a way of being drawn to that kind of light when they discover those who shine with it —whether it be the need for kindness, strength, or simply deep down craving to be able to gain that kind of peace and perspective for their own selves. I think we all know innately that is where we truly want to be, and what will help our inner-selves sing regardless of what is thrown at us. Being positive, merry etc…does not mean that a person is blinded, unaware, or unable to face the reality of situations…it simply means that they choose to not let fear rule them, or taint their inner-voice and vision.

The reason I am writing on this, is because I often feel a tug between the two. I believe that naturally I am a positive person…it takes so little to “light-me-up” per say, and I always try to trust and have faith that things will work-out for the best, and the reasons will eventually be revealed. However, I struggle with some lingering anxiety issues that stem from ptsd struggles, despite nearly a decade of otherwise being free of that. Largely, certain types of social interactions, exposing myself/ making myself vulnerable in certain ways causes me to clench-up, and get into the negative fear-based merry-go-round that holds me back, and restricts me from engaging in what I most need, and what would help to bring more happiness into my life. I am fully aware of the issue, and striving to resolve it, but often find myself stuck regardless. Logically, I can see how what I think likely is not true, and see the damage that it causes– but it is hard to get past regardless.

We all need to be kind, and understanding of those who do have depression, anxiety, ptsd issues etc.. because sometimes no matter how much we desire to be open and happy, our inner-wiring can work against us, and deprive us spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. Simply telling someone to “perk-up, look on the bright-side, get past it” isn’t always enough, and it can even cause more harm than good (a person can feel all the more down on themselves for not being able to simply shift gears like that). Sometimes what is needed most is an understanding hand, non-judgmental ears to listen, a gentle knowing voice that can help untangle things… and simply guiding by example, and through the sharing of your own inner “light” and faith.  A merry heart is not just medicine to our own souls, but also to the souls of others.